vlogolution network » money

Funky Spunk: Michael Jackson is NOT the Biological POP!

Michelle — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 23:16:45 +0000

Michael Jackson may have been the "King of Pop" and a proud Poppa but he didn't pop out one of his own. Who'd a spunk it!

Not even a week after Michael Jackson’s sudden passing and the tributes have already begun to wane and make way for a full on Thriller of a media Freak Show. With an estate possibly worth a billion dollars in question (minus the $400 million dollars of reported debt), and three young children survived by Michael, more of MJ’s biological skeletons may be rattling out of his chateau-sized closet.

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Sasha Obama’s Pool Party was a Big Splash for Taxpayers?

Michelle — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 15:50:29 +0000

Happy Eighth Birthday Sasha Obama! Hope it was a big splash!

President Obama is not only an exemplary politician but also a role model of a father. In a news article published in the Baltimore Sun yesterday, Barack emphasized the importance of maintaining a normal family life in his White House by making his young daughters’ schedules a priority on his to do list. In fact, so much so that the Prez was quoted as saying, “You know, we had travel. I had to go to Normandy. And then the girls had, Sasha had her birthday party here, and she was flying folks in for a pool party. So, really, it revolves around the girls’ social schedule.”

According to Blackcelebkids.com, Sasha O.’s eighth birthday was a full four day fête (June 7^th – 10^th) while living it up in Paris, France and London, England (even closing tourist hotspot Westminster Abbey!) and according to Dad, a pool party at the White House. That’s quite some birthday for an eight-year-old! Next year’s decadent festivities may have to top Paris Hilton’s twenty-first bday debauchery.

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Best Recession Biz: Flipping Burgers Over Obama!

Michelle — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 20:27:05 +0000

Photo art by Michelle.

The economy might be in the can but all hail the Commander of Cheese!

Inarguably, the current state of the economy is grim if not hopeless. Economic forecasters expect unemployment numbers to continue to rise. For those of you fretting over a pink slip fear not! Entrepreneurism in the fast food industry is alive and well in the greater Washington D.C. metro area. If you’re just a short drive from the District, consider cashing in a last unemployment check, tying on an apron and start flippin’ burgers. Say what?! Yup, flipping burgers for the politicos along the Potomac is the new cash cow. Should Prez Obama and entourage stop in at your greasy spoon for a bite the overnight over lunch publicity could have you bringing home the bacon.

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Obama’s Thugs Scare New Yorkers SHIrTLESS!!!

Michelle — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:40:48 +0000

Lady Libery Gives Air Force One the One Finger Salute. Photo art by Michelle.

Y’all remember September 11th, 2001, that now notorious day in world history when a Saudi thug by the name of Osama Bin Laden was credited for the worst terrorist attack on U.S. soil ever? It’s been quite some time, so your memory might be a wee bit foggy. Especially for those of you who weren’t on the island of Manhattan, or a bridge or tunnel’s distance away that late summer morning.

Fast forward seven-and-half years later to present day. We have a new thug by the name of Obama in the White House. He’s a super cool cat, sensitive and congenial. He’s the people’s clear choice for HOPE and CHANGE and all that other really, really, good Socialist mumbo jumbo. So Mack Daddy Obama, why did this assholish event take place Monday, involving YOUR 747 jet diving through lower Manhattan?!! Granted, it did say “Air Force One” on the side for anyone with Superman-esque laser vision to see. Of course, assuming those same people weren’t also fleeing for their lives. Mr. President, I’m sure you have a fascinating explanation. Perhaps you just didn’t know what your incompetent employees were planning to do with tax payers’ loose CHANGE of $329,000 dollars, right G?

Well, it turns out Mr. Prez didn’t know diddly ’bout this shizzle and is pissed, fo real yo. Mr. Louis Caldera claims responsibility for the super duper idea to fly Air Force One over New York City and New Jersey. The purpose? It was for a “training flight” AND sexy mid-air flyover photo shoot, barely missing Lady Liberty’s left ear. I wonder where he brewed such a fab plan to terrorize thousands of New Yorkers SHIrTLESS? Me thinks most likely while on the can – what better place to come up with crap (like me writing this blog)! This “hip” administration just couldn’t stand to have the same old passé photographs of Air Force One hanging over Mount Rushmore. Ugh…that’s so “100 days” ago. It would look tacky on the many coffee tabletops at the White House Crib. Gotta impress the international homies, word.

During a press conference a pissed-off Mayor Mike Bloomberg politely stated that the photo shoot was “insensitive” and that he was “furious” that he wasn’t told about it. Someone forgot to pass the Mayor of New York City a memo?! Oopsie…

For the $329,000 large the government wasted on some dope pics and a joyride, they could’ve purchased 465 licenses of Adobe Photoshop CS4 with a bonus of three blinged out camels, ten goats and 12 jackasses. Well, maybe hold the jackasses – Obama’s already got those positions filled.

If a talentless half-wit like myself can hack together the above picture in Photoshop all by my lonesome, I’d place a Fifty Cent bet that a non-paid White House intern can too. They could save even more taxpayer money and download an illegal copy (no biggie by Washington’s standards)! Surely Prez Obama’s peeps are familiar with Photoshop. I mean, c’mon, isn’t that what they used to create his “legitimate” birth certificate that’s been circulating around the internet? And why do they need new pictures anyway?! Is the President planning to charter out Air Force One to rich Middle-Eastern oil or real estate magnates? I hear the Bin Laden family is filthy rich.

Answers damn it, New Yawkers want REAL ANSWERS!!! And possibly a few government goofballs’ cushy jobs WHACKED!

Miss California Hates Gays and Jesus Does Too!!!

Michelle — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 20:42:29 +0000

This message was approved by "Jesus" of My Local Bodega. Thanks sweet Jesus! Photo art by Michelle.

Oh poor Carrie Prejean’s “anti-gay” statement has gotten her in quite the publicity pickle and perhaps cost her the crown in the Miss USA Pageant. Carrie darling, surely you must have better social etiquette than to say such a scandalous thing to an openly gay Miss USA judge! Were you slipped truth serum backstage and that was the cause of your loose tongue? Did Mr. Perez Hilton leave a gift basket full of magically delicious mushroom muffins in your dressing room and while hallucinating wonderfulness onstage Jesus whispered your now infamous response in your ear? After all, who in their right mind gives such an honest and blunt answer with so much riding on the line?!

There’s been too much news coverage on this “scandal” it’s really outstanding. I must say Miss Prejean, I give you total props for your brutal honesty – whether I agree with it or not. That’s what this country is about – agreeing to disagree. Such an answer is unpopular in your home state of California and uber unpopular with the fickle Hollywood set. Even f’ing tabloid hos like Miley Cyrus and Britney Spears are jumping on your publicity gravy train on Twitter! And the reality is Carrie, you’ve probably received more media attention with your answer had you actually won the crown. Kudos again. By the way, does anyone know who did win?

As for my personal thoughts on gay marriage/civil unions, well, I could really give a rat’s @## what two consenting adults chose to do. I kind of live by the libertarian and Hugh Heffner attitude of so long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else and feels good then go for it. Who the hell am I to judge?

Personal opinions aside, facts are facts and the wedding industry tends to be recession proof. Even in this crap shoot economy enamored couples still want to get hitched (a groomzilla friend of a friend is spending $250+ a head). So, imagine if more states cashed in on gay marriage/civil unions (the old ball and chain, whatever you want to call it). The potential to stimulate Main Street in your local market could be tremendous. Bakeries, florists, wedding planners, chapels, temples, caterers, wedding singers, travel agencies, beauty salons, photographers, videographers, LAWYERS and more could all BENEFIT from more MOOLAH! Picture the extra revenue stream small town divorce or contracts lawyers could earn JUST from preparing and negotiating prenuptial agreements. Really, it could be FABULOUS! And if the state of marital bliss should deteriorate, rot and fester like the majority of “opposite marriages” in America those lawyers will have the opportunity to pounce for the real kill – DIVORCE! After the personal pain, angst, heartache and time consumed in divorce (we’ll assume the prenup protected assets) should these newly divorced singletons fall foolishly in love and want to head down the aisle yet again, LAWYERS and other wedding service and hospitality businesses can cash in a second time. Or a third. Woo-hoo!

Who here is for gay marriage more MONEY? Well, the bottom-line is business is never personal…or is it? One thing that’s certain and remains a constant in our society is our love and need for the big bucks and here in the States many worship the cash cow. So, who cares what your sexual orientation is, what your religious beliefs, morals and ethics are (or lack thereof). MONEY is a universal love and the power of LOVE conquers all.

Oh yeah, and the comment about Jesus in the title of this post, that was just the open opinion of “Jesus” at my friendly, local bodega. At least that’s what it sounded like he grumbled. Okay, I’ve never actually been to a bodega.

I’M OUT OF TOILET PAPER!!!

Alexander P Morris — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 22:00:00 +0000

With the U.S. dollar’s horrendous decline in value this video gives new meaning to disposable income and going green… At least we finally know what the pyramid on our bills represents, just another ponzi / pyramid scheme managed and operated by the Federal Reserve, and fueled by our government’s incessant bailouts and deficit spending.

Wall Street’s BAD ASS: Timothy Sykes moMONEY Interview – Craziest Interview EVER!

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 12:00:07 +0000

SHARE/SUBSCRIBE/RATE/COMMENT/FAVE IT! Timothy Sykes: “Wall Street Warrior” or Wall Street’s Bad Ass? Tim Sykes, author of “An American Hedge Fund”, took 12 grand and turned it into $2 million by age 22 and then lost $700,000 in his hedge fund. Ouch! Despite the fall from grace Tim acts like he’s on top of the world in what just may be the nuttiest Wall Street interview you’ve ever watched!

Timothy Sykes and Alexander Paul Morris, Music: “KYA” by Paulus

Part of $33 BILLION that you didn’t even know you had may be yours!

Alexander P Morris — Thu, 17 May 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Recently Vienna Marriott received a letter in the mail saying that the State was holding unclaimed funds in her name. At first she thought it was a scam, but it lead her to finding money she never even realized she was entitled to – without spending a dime! There are nearly $33 BILLION worth of unclaimed property funds nationwide in the U.S., and some of those funds may belong to you! Find out how you may also be able to claim and collect money you didn’t even know was yours! And don’t forget to check the links, notes, and transcript section for a list of websites to help you on your search!

The Glamorous Life of Vienna Marriott :: Part 1

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 29 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Cewebrity Vienna Marriott spotted at a fancy-schmancy gala event at the Museum of Natural History in New York City.

How to Win the Million Dollar Challenge :: Trading with the Stars

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Welcome back to another Celebrity Filled Hotroastin’ mo Money episode of “Trading with the Stars”! Some of you may recall a few weeks back when Vienna Marriott gave us a few of her picks for CNBC’s “Million Dollar Portfolio Challenge”. However, we had no idea how well they would actually perform. Today she shares with us some of her secrets, introduces us to Alexander’s new ebook, “How to Win the Million Dollar Challenge”, and shares with us a few new interesting stock picks to check out! Stock mentions: NASD:CHAP, NASD:NBIX, NASD:SBGI, NYSE:CHD, NASD:ONXX

Heavy’s Angels : I WON! I WON! Woo-hoo!!!

Alexander P Morris — Wed, 11 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

It all began with a steamy, bubble bath last October and that’s where it comes to an end now. Michelle Renee Coudon is the Heavy’s Angels 2006-2007 Winner taking home over $25,000 dollars in cash and swag!!! Thank you all and Heavysan, me love you long time! xOxO muah! Music “Babette” by Fundamental.

Vienna Exposed :: Behind-the-Scenes

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Get a hot and steamy, behind-the-scenes glimpse of the web’s favorite cewebrity, Vienna Marriott. Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears – move over! Music: “Babette” by Fundamental.

Vienna Marriott’s How-to Handle Your Haters

Michelle — Sat, 07 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Vienna Marriott, the cewebrity you either “love to love” or “love to hate” gives her steamy, bubble bath advice on how to handle haters online. Music: “Babette” by Fundamental

No Inflation? – You too can make a 2.2 Million% Percent return in the stock market!

Alexander P Morris — Tue, 18 Apr 2006 22:00:00 +0000

No Inflation? – So what’s up with the Exploding Money Supply! The fed inflates our money, reduces our buying power, but at least they can let us know the current level of M3!
Also, learn how you too can make a 2,210,369% return in the stock market!