Even if you made Santa’s naughty list this Noel, you’re still in for a festive treat. This frosty and frothy tipple is both naughty AND nice and a delight yule love.  This New Year’s weekend, we’ll whip up a lush libation that’s that’s LOADED with sugar and spice and booze shaken over ice. Get ready to make some Spiced EggSCHnog (with spiced rum, butterscotch schnapps and eggnog) for a rockin’ 2011!

For another delicious Yuletide tipple, check out this winter cocktail that’ll put you in high “Ho! Ho! Ho!” holiday spirits.  Learn how to make some hot Candy Cane Cocoa!

You’re cordially invited to subscribe to the party here, join Michelle Coudon on Facebook & follow her Naughty Tweets for more Naughty Tipples. To order a fun-spirited drink, or to suggest a beverage with benefits tweet @michelleCtv.

Music by Jbrock44 “Jingle Bells (Hot Chocolate & Rum Mix)”, Pitx “It Wasn’t Me”, Loveshadow “We R 1″ and FuriousStereo “Rainha do Sol Remix” and kcentric “Desaprendere” all via http://www.ccmixter.org.

*** NOTE: This is the “Non-Explicit” Version for YOUTUBE. However, the original was NEVER “Explicit”! A YouTube Editor featured it as the #1 Spotlight Video in Education on 1/4/2011, which subsequently led to its flagged demise. Despite that, Youtube’s Review Team informed me they would NOT unflag it.  So, now you have two fun-filled versions. Cheers! Here’s the “Explicit” Version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OW1P63VnvqI Kind of ironic for anyone who’s ever watched a Britney Spears or Lady Gaga “non-explicit” video on YouTube… lol

A Park Avenue Princess is sophisticated, sweet and sassy.  Think Sex and the City’s Charlotte York Goldenblatt. In this episode, you’ll learn how to make to make a posh Park Avenue Princess wine cocktail filled with refreshing ice, Grape Vodka, 7UP soda, fresh lemon juice & red wine. After a long and tedious day shopping along Madison Avenue, this chic drink will cool you off on a boiling hot July afternoon.  Kick off your Choos, relax on your chaise, sip this reservatrol friendly tipple and enjoy!

Sophisticates who “Love The City Life” won’t want to miss watching how to make a sexy and skinny Cosmopolitan.  If you like a sweet and playful tease then this bubbly Flirtini is for you!  Stay tuned for a Naughty Tipple I’ll be serving up soon.  The World’s Most Crude Cocktail – a BP Oil Spill!

You’re cordially invited to subscribe to the party here,  join Michelle Coudon on Facebook & follow on Twitter for more upcoming videos on the BEST hangover cures and of course Naughty Tipples.  To order a drink or to suggest a “beverage with benefits” just tweet @michelleCtv.

Music by Loveshadow “We R 1″ , FuriousStereo “Rainha do Sol Remix”, kcentric “Desaprendere” (featuring Silvia O. Silky Jazz Mix) and dabra “Madrugada” (Daniel_s_remix) via http://www.ccmixter.org.  For the original Skyy Vodka recipe visit: http://bit.ly/9LbZoA.

In this episode you’ll learn how-to make to make a sexy Cosmopolitan cocktail that’s so delicious it’ll even knock off Carrie Bradshaw’s panties…well, if she’s wearing any!  Like the ladies of Sex and the City, a Cosmo is perfect for those who Love The City Life (Lemon-flavored vodka, Triple Sec, Cranberry Juice and Lime Juice).

For you imbibers that like your Cosmo on the sweet side, you’ll also learn how to make a Skinny Cosmopolitan.  After all, stylish ladies (or some dudes) won’t be able to fit into their Choos or Manolos after drinking too many calories!  And for the fellows who might stumble across this how-to, you’ll learn how a Cosmopolitan cocktail can make you a chick magnet.  Gotta love beverages with benefits!

You’ll also learn that sipping Cosmopolitans may better your sexual health.  Cranberry juice is excellent at both treating and preventing a lower urinary tract infection.  And a busy city gal looking for love can’t be inconvenienced with a nasty UTI.  So, drink to your health!  Bottoms up, baby!

You’re cordially invited to subscribe to the party here or join Michelle on Facebook or follow @michelleCtv on Twitter for more upcoming videos on the BEST hangover cures and of course Naughty Tipples.

Music by Loveshadow “We R 1″ , FuriousStereo “Rainha do Sol Remix” and kcentric “Desaprendere” (featuring Silvia O. Silky Jazz Mix) via http://www.ccmixter.org .

Just about everyone knows that when the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve that the crystal ball drops in New York City’s Times Square. However, what New Yorkers know (that many watching cozily at home on the tube may not) is that at the same moment, a festive show of fireworks lights up the winter night sky over Central Park, ushering in a new year. And 2010‘s firework finale was an especially spectacular display!

Happy New Year! Live it to be your best yet!

Music by Loveshadow “Dreams” (The White Stilleto Mix) via CCmixter.org

If you’re a vegan, or animal rights activist against seafood consumerism and consumption, now is the best time for you to click the back button on your browser and leave this how-to at once (but thanks for stopping by!).  Okay, so if you’re still reading this I assume you looovvee the mouth-watering and heavenly taste of a lobster tail lightly spritzed with tangy lemon juice and dunked in warm, drawn  butter.  If so, read and watch on my fellow lobster lovah!

]]> http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2009-09-10-how-to-kill-and-cook-a-lobster/feed/ 173 http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2009-05-20-ruth-madoff-hates-you/ http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2009-05-20-ruth-madoff-hates-you/#comments Wed, 20 May 2009 18:55:56 +0000 http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/?p=475

Ruth Madoff is banking on your gullibility and victims' cash. Apparently, she's also plagued with man hands.

Quickie: ABC News released this news clip today (click here) of a hissy Ruth Madoff.

When asked for a response to her husband’s victims by a reporter, an emaciated Ruthie offered a curt “no response”.  Judging by the footage, it may be a tad bit old as I was under the impression that she had retreated to her cave down in the Sunshine State.  Or, she recently hopped back on her broomstick and headed north for Lower Manhattan, I dunno.

Although, I must say from the video, Ruthie’s blondie coif isn’t looking so chic.  Dirty, dishwater roots – yuck!  Guess this succubus has still been unable to find a stylist unafraid of her plotting Madoffian ways. Muah-ha-ha-ha!

Spitting on pedestrians has become a problem on the ritzy Upper East Side of Manhattan. Photo art by Michelle.

New Yorkers are notorious for their pushiness, bluntness, and at times, for being downright rude and lewd. I’m certainly not the embodiment of “Miss Manners”, or as well-versed in etiquette as the Countess LuAnn de Lesseps, however, this I know: PUBLIC SPITTING MUST STOP NOW!

For the several years that I’ve lived in New York City, a city of eight million, I’ve witnessed many uncouth and disgusting displays of human interaction (well, assuming they were human). Common sightings include drunken bar brawls, feuding lovers, insane cab drivers, dueling transvestites, the trampling of the homeless, public urination, defecation and public transit masturbation. Really, New Yorkers have seen it all, and yes, at times life here seems to simulate an episode of Seinfeld.

Don’t get me wrong – the city CAN BE an amazingly wonderful and exhilarating place. Although, there are just some days that my threshold for the usual public assholeness is beyond intolerant.

Exceptions can be made for the ill, or for people who really can’t help themselves. For example, a few weeks ago I was about to swipe my Metrocard at a subway turnstile, when I noticed it was raining indoors just a few feet away from me. As I was pondering to myself, “Where the hell is that leak coming from?”, I then noticed a woman in a business jacket and skirt was “leaking” just a yard away from my ballet flats. Too dumbfounded to pull my cell phone out to capture the totally public event, I couldn’t help but feel sympathy for this woman, yet nervously I giggled my “watching a train wreck” idiotic laugh. That poor woman’s humiliating incontinence was a clear exception.

However, one thing that is completely unacceptable can best be described by another recent event involving someone’s saliva hurling through the air towards my feet. As I was walking towards Park Avenue on a tree-lined street on the Upper East Side one pleasant afternoon, an off duty doorman hocked a loogie at my freakin’ toes. Shocked and disgusted I nearly slipped in his puddle of slobber. WTF?!!! This jerk WAITED until someone was walking right by to SPIT AT THEM. To top it off, right in front of a CHURCH! Out of the corner of my eye, I gave him a severely disapproving glance (to say the least). As if being nearly spat on wasn’t bad enough, that jerk, with cigarette in mouth and cell phone in hand, called ME a “F*CKING BITCH“!!!  I started to walk away, as it was obvious this Napoleon-sized, insolent little man had bigger issues (and one of them probably being a lesser man in the pants). But that sunny afternoon, I was NOT going to let it slide (even though I nearly did)!  I turned on my heels and did a one-eighty.  Once he saw that I was headed back his way, he continued his salutation of “F*CK YOU BITCH“.  I furiously inquired why he attempted to spit on me and his response was, “Well, it’s not like I actually hit you.  Just almost” .  As a crowd began to gather, I asked him if his mother was a camel and if that’s the reason why he was unable to curb his urge to sputter out spittle.

Turns out that HE INDEED MUST be a camel man hybrid, because he was at a complete and utter loss for words.  Or rather, it’s more likely that his vocabulary is limited to just three insulting one-syllable words and a giant gob of gooey mouth spew.

I take pride in my sense of diplomacy; I have empathy for people who have overactive salivary glands.   Truly, I do.  However, I refuse to tolerate spitting misogynist asses.  And if “bitch” means not being a pushover, and having SELF-RESPECT and RESPECT FOR OTHERS, then by all means I AM A “BITCH”.

Dear readers, are you also sick and tired of lacking manners and non-existent general decency?  Please comment and share your thoughts and experiences!

Lady Libery Gives Air Force One the One Finger Salute. Photo art by Michelle.

Y’all remember September 11th, 2001, that now notorious day in world history when a Saudi thug by the name of Osama Bin Laden was credited for the worst terrorist attack on U.S. soil ever? It’s been quite some time, so your memory might be a wee bit foggy. Especially for those of you who weren’t on the island of Manhattan, or a bridge or tunnel’s distance away that late summer morning.

Fast forward seven-and-half years later to present day. We have a new thug by the name of Obama in the White House. He’s a super cool cat, sensitive and congenial. He’s the people’s clear choice for HOPE and CHANGE and all that other really, really, good Socialist mumbo jumbo. So Mack Daddy Obama, why did this assholish event take place Monday, involving YOUR 747 jet diving through lower Manhattan?!!  Granted, it did say “Air Force One” on the side for anyone with Superman-esque laser vision to see.  Of course, assuming those same people weren’t also fleeing for their lives.  Mr. President, I’m sure you have a fascinating explanation.  Perhaps you just didn’t know what your incompetent employees were planning to do with tax payers’ loose CHANGE of $329,000 dollars, right G?

Well, it turns out Mr. Prez didn’t know diddly ’bout this shizzle and is pissed, fo real yo. Mr. Louis Caldera claims responsibility for the super duper idea to fly Air Force One over New York City and New Jersey.  The purpose?  It was for a “training flight” AND sexy mid-air flyover photo shoot, barely missing Lady Liberty’s left ear.  I wonder where he brewed such a fab plan to terrorize thousands of New Yorkers SHIrTLESS? Me thinks most likely while on the can – what better place to come up with crap (like me writing this blog)! This “hip” administration just couldn’t stand to have the same old passé photographs of Air Force One hanging over Mount Rushmore.  Ugh…that’s so “100 days” ago.  It would look tacky on the many coffee tabletops at the White House Crib.  Gotta impress the international homies, word.

During a press conference a pissed-off Mayor Mike Bloomberg politely stated that the photo shoot was “insensitive” and that he was “furious” that he wasn’t told about it.  Someone forgot to pass the Mayor of New York City a memo?! Oopsie…

For the $329,000 large the government wasted on some dope pics and a joyride, they could’ve purchased 465 licenses of Adobe Photoshop CS4 with a bonus of three blinged out camels, ten goats and 12 jackasses.  Well, maybe hold the jackasses – Obama’s already got those positions filled.

If a talentless half-wit like myself can hack together the above picture in Photoshop all by my lonesome, I’d place a Fifty Cent bet that a non-paid White House intern can too. They could save even more taxpayer money and download an illegal copy (no biggie by Washington’s standards)!  Surely Prez Obama’s peeps are familiar with Photoshop.  I mean, c’mon, isn’t that what they used to create his “legitimate” birth certificate that’s been circulating around the internet? And why do they need new pictures anyway?! Is the President planning to charter out Air Force One to rich Middle-Eastern oil or real estate magnates? I hear the Bin Laden family is filthy rich.

Answers damn it, New Yawkers want REAL ANSWERS!!! And possibly a few government goofballs’ cushy jobs WHACKED!

I am a handy gal. This video was just a quickie. I got the job done in under a minute. Book me baby.

Ring Size: 4.5 Glove: 7

Photos by Andrew Brucker:

http://www.andrewbruckerheadshots.com

Music:

“Oxymoron” by Kcentric
]]> http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2008-08-02-need-a-hand-job/feed/ 37 http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2008-06-16-eat-my-flaming-balls/ http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2008-06-16-eat-my-flaming-balls/#comments Sun, 15 Jun 2008 22:00:00 +0000 http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/?page_id=173

A jaunt out to a local Japanese restaurant, can you guess how many times we said “flaming balls”?!
]]> http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2008-06-16-eat-my-flaming-balls/feed/ 60 http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2008-04-28-cutest-baby-ducks-in-nyc/ http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/2008-04-28-cutest-baby-ducks-in-nyc/#comments Sun, 27 Apr 2008 22:00:00 +0000 http://www.vlogolution.com/hot/?page_id=169

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