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Rebecca Gayheart, Eric Dane and That Other Girl’s Threesome Sex Tape EXCLUSIVE PICS

Michelle — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 22:43:04 +0000

The sex tape was a wash-up but hopefully you'll find this illustration to be a fun splash. One thing is certain - whatever is going on above beats "three men in a tub". Rub-a-Dub-Dub, baby! Composite art by Michelle.

The month of August typically brings heat, bothersome humidity and media doldrums. It’s been quite some time since a steamy celebrity sex tape hit the Internet and today was no exception. Recently, Gawker.com published a censored version of a “sex tape” starring Grey’s Anatomy star, Eric Dane (along with his anatomy), his wife former Noxema girl, Rebecca Gayheart and former beauty queen turned wanna-be Heidi Fleiss, Kari Ann Periche. I use quotations loosely around sex tape because although there is nudity (refer to Fleshbot.com’s version) there wasn’t much sex….or any remotely interesting happenings. I retract that statement. There was some hot fondling of rubber duckies dipping underwater during the “bathtub scene” along with the use of questionable contraband. Oh, yeah and one chick’s alter ego is named “Nina” and the dude is Peter Cocaine Cowboy or something another. Giddy-up!!!

It seems like this celeb erotic film of late has lost a stiff wind in its sail (well, a stiff anything). And this uneventful one may leaves its stars all washed up and high and dry.

P.S. Unfortunately the released sex footage was a boring bust so I felt compelled to make it up to you dear readers with the above Photoshopped pièce de résistance. Enjoy!

Freak Show: Joe Jackson Pimps Michael Jackson’s Memorial Service

Michelle — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 18:29:08 +0000

Tickets to attend Jackson's memorial service circus will have fans shelling out more than mere peanuts.

Update: Tickets are free via online lottery. Over 1.6 million people registered for the chance to receive one of the 17,500 free tickets.

The King of Pop is dead but the “Wacko” media circus is alive and well! Radaronline.com posted on their blog today that Michael Jackson’s memorial service will be held at the Staples Center in Los Angeles next Tuesday, July 7th.

Michael Jackson’s father Joe Jackson is said to be in charge of this Hollywierd extravaganza, milking his cash cow of a son, even in death. The two hour long service will have many superstars in attendance. However, Jacko’s fans will have to shell out a lot more than mere peanuts to attend this memorial circus. The nosebleed seats are set to have a nauseating ticket price: a whopping twenty-five clams a pop. M.J. merchandise not included! Gotta love show biz – it’s oh so clASSy!

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Sasha Obama’s Pool Party was a Big Splash for Taxpayers?

Michelle — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 15:50:29 +0000

Happy Eighth Birthday Sasha Obama! Hope it was a big splash!

President Obama is not only an exemplary politician but also a role model of a father. In a news article published in the Baltimore Sun yesterday, Barack emphasized the importance of maintaining a normal family life in his White House by making his young daughters’ schedules a priority on his to do list. In fact, so much so that the Prez was quoted as saying, “You know, we had travel. I had to go to Normandy. And then the girls had, Sasha had her birthday party here, and she was flying folks in for a pool party. So, really, it revolves around the girls’ social schedule.”

According to Blackcelebkids.com, Sasha O.’s eighth birthday was a full four day fête (June 7^th – 10^th) while living it up in Paris, France and London, England (even closing tourist hotspot Westminster Abbey!) and according to Dad, a pool party at the White House. That’s quite some birthday for an eight-year-old! Next year’s decadent festivities may have to top Paris Hilton’s twenty-first bday debauchery.

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FINGER AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL

Michelle — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 22:00:00 +0000

America’s Sexiest Hand Supermodel, Fingerella Strokeoneoff, gives us the lowdown on hand jobs, celebritydom and recovery from her drug addiction. Watch out for this diva or she might introduce yo’ @ss to da F.i.S.t.!

OPRAH does YOUTUBE but DOESN’T DO COMMENTS :: Celebrity HUMP IT or DUMP IT Quickie – COMMENT HERE!

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 22:00:00 +0000

DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE, RATE IT, FAVE IT, COMMENT, VID RESPONSE & FRIEND US ~ ciao for now ;o)

The big O has come to Youtube! And the O is in Oprah, the O-riginal Queen of all Media (in case you pervs were thinking something else!).

Music: “Let’s Do Crime” by Fundamental

POST OPRAH’S YOUTUBE SHOW UPDATE:

Oprah’s show on YouTube seemed more interested in Patrick Swayze’s re-release of Dirty Dancing and the few viral videos that exploded across the Internet, and not at all on the diehard YouTubers who day in and day out work hard and slave over trying to come up with new material to entertain and make people laugh (ALL WITHOUT A TEAM OF 14 COMEDIC WRITERS like we’re hearing so much about with the writer’s strike!!, BY THE WAY). In addition, it seems that Oprah is not allowing comments on her videos – well, at least not approving very many of them.

When you have a brand to protect, I guess you really can’t allow much for “freedom of the people’s press”, which is a big part of what YouTube is all about.

Guess negative comments like “you suck go die” are only constructive for us little YouTubers!!

Regardless, feel free to leave all your OPRAH-related thoughts and comments on our vid!

Paris Hilton BACK In JAIL :: Exclusive Leaked Footage – Body Cavity STRIP Search!

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Paris Hilton, hotel heiress and celebritante, has officially surrendered herself to the Los Angeles County Sheriffs’ authorities and has begun to serve her 23 day sentence. We at HotRoast have obtained exclusive footage of Paris’ check-in and full booty.. er, body cavity search.

Paris Hilton Exclusive: Pump It Up for the POKEY! Jail – Jailbait Couture

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 28 May 2007 22:00:00 +0000

With the recent debut and success of Paris the Heiress’ fashion line, Jailbait Couture, Paris and her Midas touch have struck gold once again with a workout series sure to get your heart rate racing. We at HotRoast have obtained exclusive footage from the fitness princess-to-be’s first workout DVD entitled “Pump It UP for the POKEY”.

Paris Hilton Exclusive Interview :: Turning Jail into Sales with Heiress’ New Fashion Collection “Jailbait Couture”

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 07 May 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Update 6/09 – E! Entertainment loved this vid for their new working pilot “Love 2 Hate” – hopefully the show will make it to the small screen! Hotel heiress turned celebritante, Paris Hilton has been sentenced to 45 days in a Los Angeles county jail for violating her probation. Despite her harsh prison sentence Paris and her Midas touch are never one to spoil a chance for media exposure. We at HotRoast have obtained an exclusive interview with Paris the Heiress herself at a recent shoot for her new fashion line fittingly named Jailbait. Now that’s hot! Music “Let’s Do Crime” by Fundamental.

The Glamorous Life of Vienna Marriott :: Part 1

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 29 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Cewebrity Vienna Marriott spotted at a fancy-schmancy gala event at the Museum of Natural History in New York City.

Celebrity HUMP IT! or DUMP IT! Top 10 Countdown

Alexander P Morris — Thu, 19 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

The Top 10 celebrity high jinx and celebrities you’re gonna want to HUMP or DUMP, featuring Vienna Marriott and Gay Salmonella!

10. Reverend Al Sharpton – 9. Reverend Jesse Jackson – 8. Kim Kardashian – 7. Sanjaya Malakar’s sister – 6. Playboy Model Holly Madison – 5. Charlotte Church – 4. Kylie Minogue –
3. Larry Birkhead – 2. Girls Gone Wild’s Joe Francis – 1. Don Imus

Vienna Exposed :: Behind-the-Scenes

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Get a hot and steamy, behind-the-scenes glimpse of the web’s favorite cewebrity, Vienna Marriott. Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears – move over! Music: “Babette” by Fundamental.

Vienna Marriott’s How-to Handle Your Haters

Michelle — Sat, 07 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Vienna Marriott, the cewebrity you either “love to love” or “love to hate” gives her steamy, bubble bath advice on how to handle haters online. Music: “Babette” by Fundamental

Tara Reid’s Ketchup

Alexander P Morris — Mon, 02 Apr 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Monet Crayola is back! American Pie Star Tara Reid has a saucy new burger joint (or ketchup joint?) opening in West Hollywood aptly named “Ketchup”. Ms. Crayola delivers pop news with an artsy fartsy spoken word spin that’s oh so uniquely “Monet”. Music: “Let’s do Crime” by Fundamental

Celebs Gone Commando – yes, that’s pantyless!!!

Michelle — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Is “going commando” a trend popularized by celebritartes Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears or rather a movement among young, modern, post-feminist women? Allure Magazine polls readers to find out if the girl-next-door is going without panties too. Music: “Babette” by Fundamental

Celebrity Voyeurism – America’s Guilty Pleasure

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 18 Mar 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Why are pointless, raw and unedited paparazzi videos of celebrities so intriguing? Especially when paired with Lindsay Lohan and a blinged out francophile giraffe…

Celeb Rehabs – Lookin’ for a Hot Vacation Spot?

Alexander P Morris — Sat, 03 Mar 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Malibu brings it. Luxury rehab that is for up to $18,500 per week. With posh digs like this screw stayin’ clean – especially if your insurance covers it! Music “Babette” by Fundamental.

HotRoast World News…Breaking Britney Spears

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 25 Feb 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Nuclear arms in Iran, suicide bombing in Iraq…yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait a minute – did you say Britney Spears?! Omg! Britney’s baldness is sooo fierce!!! Amazing how this is what seems to get the most national attention…

Which SEXY CELEB are YOU?

Alexander P Morris — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 22:00:00 +0000

Have you been told that you look like a famous celebrity? Now you can put those brownnosers’ compliments or backhanded insults to test with MyHeritage.com’s Celebrity Face Recognition. Music “Babbette” by Fundamental.

Lindsay Lohan : Delusions of Grandeur : Celeb Spoof

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 10 Dec 2006 22:00:00 +0000

Soo, Al Gore is cleaning up the environment starting with Lindsay Lohan?? This vid is a “what if” Lindsay Lohan had made that now infamous email (as published by the New York Post) into a vlog.

American Idol Karaoke

Alexander P Morris — Wed, 18 Oct 2006 22:00:00 +0000

Killer Karaoke American Idol Style!!! Ouch…I think I just blew an ear drum.

More Sexy Bubble Bath Fun

Alexander P Morris — Tue, 03 Oct 2006 22:00:00 +0000

Well, just a lil’ bit more bathtime fun. Wanna join me? Watch me get ready to rock out my very first covert mission as a Heavy’s Angel. Tres top secret…

Hi everyone! Watch my second video for Heavy.com’s new program,
Heavy’s Angels. It recently got a shoutout in the Wall Street Journal –
woo-hoo! Thanks for your support, keep watching and forward this video to your friends! xoxo ~ Michelle (Music: “Bonjour Ma Cherie” by Tomas Phusion)

Suri Cruise Unveiled – Celeb Arrests: Paris Hilton & 50 Cent – La Lohan: Victim of Grand Theft

Alexander P Morris — Sun, 10 Sep 2006 22:00:00 +0000

Finally!!! Suri Cruise Unveiled :: Celeb Arrests – Paris Hilton and 50 cent :: Lindsay Lohan: Victim of Grand Theft (or forgetfulness)

Disclaimer: The images used of Suri Cruise in association with Vanity Fair in this video are NOT actually represenative of Suri Cruise’s image or the October 2006 issue of Vanity Fair. It’s a parody people – just so you know.

Oops… Britney did it again!

Michelle — Mon, 26 Jun 2006 22:00:00 +0000

If you haven’t been living under a rock this month you might have noticed that Britney Spears has been a current hot topic of entertainment… I mean discussion. Between the interview and Brit’s toxic waste, here are a few more ideas of what we could do…